Are you waiting for someone or something?

In this day and age where many people complain that they don't seem to have sufficient to do everything they want to, time is undoubtedly precious. Yet:

1. People keep one another waiting.
I am usually on time or at the most 10 minutes late even when I meet guys. I won't date him after he's late twice without valid reasons. If he can't respect my time at the beginning, it's unlikely that he would value my time in the future.
Friends who make use of me as a companion only to run off when someone more exciting comes along or if I need their help are just wasting my time. I am more than happy to cut them off completely. I can't get back the time that I spent on them but I have to cut my losses.
Many people will advise me to chill and not to be so uptight. But, hey, I have many things to do other than wait for others and allow them to waste my time for me - even if it's just sipping tea at the coffee shop it's still something to do!

2. People waste other people's time.
People put others on hold as Plan B in case their Plan A doesn't work out. This applies to relationships as well as daily activities, e.g. someone may have arranged to meet me, I put my other plans on hold and then he/she cancels at the last minute.

3. People are waiting for someone to do things together.
This could mean partners for marriage, sex, sports, travel or just to hang out with. These people frequently complain of boredom. They say that they can't do what they want to do because they have no companions. I stay away from people who always say that they are bored. People who are always bored are boring.

4. People are waiting for something to happen.
They like to say that they would do something if they have the money and time. I think it's normal to have limitations and limited resources.
E.g. I may want to retire early but I need to have enough money saved up before I can do that. If I want to travel, I need to have money to pay for it. So the question is, am I working towards it or am I waiting passively for something to happen like winning the lottery or an all expenses-paid holiday?
Many people might say that they would like to travel but would say that they don't have time, money or companions to do it with. I think they just don't want it badly enough. Or perhaps they don't even like to travel but they say that they would like to so that they don't appear strange. If they really want something, they got to make it happen.

5. People say that they have no choice
They have to keep doing what they dislike/hate because they have no choice.
I don't believe in 'no choice'. Even if someone puts a gun to your head, you've got at least 2 choices. Choices are limited by our brains. Through "creative thinking", thinking "out of the box" and brainstorming, people can come up with more ideas and choices.
I believe that there are many things (90%) that are beyond our control. But we still need to make a conscious effort to work on the 10% which we can control to increase the number of choices available to us. E.g. If I want a (real, not online) boyfriend I won't be able to get one if I stay cooped up at home 24x7. If I still can't find a boyfriend I can't say I have no choice because if I want to be some old man's girlfriend I think he would be more than happy to accept me but I have simply chosen not to consider him.

There are many places in the world that I would like to visit and things that I would like to do. I travel or do things alone most of the time because I don't have suitable companions with the same interest and mentality. People have remarked that I'm weird or a loner and some even feel sad for me. I don't care what they say. If I were to wait for companions for everything, I'll never do anything with my life.

Seize the moment. It's your life - go live it!

Related posts:
No time? How do you spend your 24 hours?
Plan B
What is the greatest gift?


Anonymous_CB said...

Each of us have priority. We may have multiple plans at one time. From here, you can view your friends, on how they prioritize you.

E.g. Friend A agrees to meet up tonight 8pm. Last minute or several hours before, they call/inform cancel plan due to something else, like got work (maybe true/false), got other appointment, cat/dog sick/passed away, etc. Ppl can come up with many reasons/excuses. It means you are not in their top priority list.

Time to evaluate the friend on future undertakings.

It's the same when you yourself have overlapping plans. Don't over promise (refer Yu-Kym's other blog on over-promise-under-deliver).

Doing a group thing requires more organisational and logistical involvement than necessary, and all that waiting takes away time from the activity itself. Essentially it's a killjoy. I'd rather hack it on my own and skip all the hassle. P.S. It's the other coffee mug pic and pink shorts btw. Heh heh.

Anonymous said...

hi...i am the sort of people that have a bad habit of waiting. i always wait for lame excuses for me to start-off any work.

but from tomoro onwards, i have to wait for unknown duration till the broadband guy come and fix my new house with internet services.

guess will be long wait.


My bad. If I had scrolled lower I would've spotted the best ever pink shorts/coffee mug pic. Enjoy your holiday, and happy 2010 to you too Yu-Kym.

Anonymous said...

Ppl just dont want to leave their comfort zone, they are afraid of the unknown...guess they will never know coz they wouldnt go for it in the first place.